Do Tell? (scene 17)

Even though it's miles, I walk the whole way home. My head is so fuzzy; I don't trust myself not to panic on the bus. My heart is beating uncontrollably in my chest; It hurts and I feel sick. I stop walking at one point, afraid i'm going to vomit. I hated Dean for trying to kiss me. Even though I'd thought about what it would be like to kiss him before – I'd never go there. He's Tara's boyfriend. Tara: what the hell was I going to tell her? Even if she couldn't remember me, remember Dean, did that mean she wouldn't care? She'd feel nothing? I got Dean was lonely; he missed his girlfriend. It wasn't a typical situation – he was looking for comfort. But it didn't mean...what did it mean? Uh, confusing. Was it to get back at Damien? Or did he actually like me? What was happening? Get real Reilly. I didn't want to think about it; It made me feel grubby inside. But I couldn't get Dean's face out of my mind.

My phone beeps. It's him – a text: I'm sorry.

It angers me. He's sorry. I blast into my house. Mum's not there thank-goodness. I go up to my room and burst into tears seeing a picture of me and Tara on my whiteboard. I feel so bad. I throw myself onto my bed and squeeze my eyes closed, waiting to drift off somewhere where reality doesn't exist.

'Reilly, are you home?' I open my eyes and it's dark. Mum's voice calls again. My stomach snarls slowly sitting up. I'm the thirstiest I'd ever been in my entire life.

'Yes,' I squeak. She appears at my bedroom door.

'Why are you sitting in the dark?' she says, flicking on a light switch. I clear my throat.

'I fell asleep.'

'They must be working you hard preparing for your exams, how's that going by the way?'

'Mum please. I'm just wakening up.'

'Pepperoni pizza for dinner?' With that I'm awake.

'That would be so awesome right now, you have no idea.' I say, feeling my stomach blowing a kiss in her direction. She looks at me like I'm kooky.

'Have you heard anymore from Tara?' She says, walking away to get a menu.

'No,' I say scratching my head and rubbing my eyes. 'But I've decided to go see her.'

'Oh yeah when?' Mum says.

'I'm thinking I really need to see her tonight.'

#Betrayal #Deceit #Bestfriend #Hazy